Am I BAD?

I feel horrible, being a human.
Well okay, that's not true, but I am being a real smart alec on Yahoo Answers. Just for entertainment reasons.
Am I evil?

Fire Fire Fire and Toilet Paper

Yes, some idiot tried to start a fire in the Men's restroom at my high school. Or they were trying to hide that they were smoking and they had to stuff the pot somewhere quick. So we all had to stand outside, with annoying alarms blaring into our ears, freezing to death. Stupid... But. Happy Valentines day... Because I won't remember to post again until then. So until next time, don't light anything on fire.

Nothing to say, especially to you

and the title says it all. i have so little to say that I'm not going to even capitalize the start of the sentences. i just need to post something. its called post-obsession, kind of clever of me to come up with. okay now i am seriously going to start doing capitals because it's bugging me.

HAPPY NEW YEAR! ! ! ! Celebrating the end of 2011 and the beginning of different digits on the end of every date! YAY! ! ! Yes, I am late, but that's okay. We've been in a new year for 11 days! Unless you're not ready this then, then it's probably more like 20 days! ! ! Yay, congratulations to you! ! ! I'm talking to you in the future! ! ! And, it could be 2016 or something over there, and I wouldn't even notice! ! ! If the world really did end on Dec. 23rd though, you wouldn't be reading this. So tell us if the world ended okay, please.

Do you believe the world is going to end?
Me: "No."
Okay
Me: "It's not possible."
What about aliens?
Me: "Then the world isn't ending is it? Just the human race."
... Okay what about... if Earth blows up?
Me: "Impossible."
What if aliens blow it up?
Me: "Extraterrestrials don't exist."
... what if we set off bombs across the entire world, blowing it apart?
Me: "Then we're stupid."


End of Conversation

Anger

I know, I know, you're mad at me for not posting something about Christmas, and I still won't, that's because I'm Jewish. Now this may cause more anger among you, but yes I don't celebrate Christmas, and I don't believe in Santa Claus. So, go ahead and release your anger, but do it in a therapy session please.
Okay now I feel bad, and it isn't because of indigestion or food poisoning, it's because I lied too you. Now don't think I am related to Satan or something, because I'm not, but lying is good for you. Yes, in small amounts that is, I'm not saying it's okay to fib all the time, but its only bad if you get addicted to it. Just like marijuana. I will make this analogy for you: Lying is like a douse of Mentsuyu on your fish. It may taste good, and give you good nutrients, but eating too much of it on you Japanese cuisine, can cause an unhealthy liver and may lead to chronic dyslexia, because it contains alcohol. I strongly suggest to stop using Japanese sauces.
erm.

Well, back to Christmas,
I got some cool, stuff. Not telling you what, you'll probably figure it out soon enough. (hint: its not Mentsuyu)
but it's a little longer than a yard, and it cost a ton of money, and you have to be really talented to use it.

So hope you had a Merry Christmas, and i'll post again later.

Translation

My brother found this online, originally written in Portuguese, translated into English, thought it was really funny.

GUIDES
The hiring of guides and porters is mandatory. As we have no use complaining to consider this as a great opportunity to meet local people, which is very friendly. Tipping is a mandatory practice in Tanzania, so if you plan to go to Kili get ready to fork over a $ 50.00 for the guide and the porters.
Particularly recommend taking some shirts of the Brazilian team, because people love our football. They know all the names of our players. Our shirt is like a free pass in many places and win it is an honor for them. Walking down the street with this shirt makes you feel like a celebrity in town.
We recommend that the expedition is engaged in Moshi, because in Arusha, a town a little bigger, everything is more expensive. Do not bother to find the companies, because they find you everywhere as long as you arrive at the airport until you can not take it anymore. Beware of these proposals, because we found some people who lost their money.
The guide of the expedition is a fantastic person and very helpful. Has climbed Kilimanjaro and Mount Meru all the way hundreds of times and speaks English very well, so would recommend it with great pride.

Not quite sure what its about, but I think...  HA HA HA HA HA... And that's about it. Full of run on sentences and needing revised fragments to the MAX.

I'm not making fun of the guy who wrote this, but of Google translate, which is where we translated it from. Maybe they should spend a little more money on their translator, because it may cause some confusion, and already has.

Wind Torn

I can't believe all the damage here in Davis County, Utah. It completely blows my mind what I've seen. A strong wind here in Layton hit, averaging about 85 mph, tearing apart fences, tipping over semi-trucks, and breaking windows. All the trees next to my house tipped over and my fence is pretty much gone.
But not as bad as other places in the neighborhood, where trees crushed cars and fences. A trailer was thrown into a house. So here's some pictures of the doom of my beloved fence.

Yah, so here's a predicament. The wheelbarrows are crushed under a fence and a tree.

Here the fence ripped out some of our wiring, hmmm, I think we have insurance.

You can't see it in this picture but our drain pipe up higher is hanging from our house and its crushed.

It also tore our trampoline apart. No more safe jumping on that thing.

Breakdancin

I'm learning how to break dance. Yes, I am. Next year my highschool's musical is Footloose. And that means I have to learn how to breakdance; they go hand in hand.

It's a nice relationship but I'm missing.

Yay. I'm sixteen years old...
Yay.
Now to the exciting stuff.
This really strange thing happened. I was waiting for a ride home, just sitting there like most people sit. And I was singing because I was happy like normal. And I was sitting and singing and I was happy. I probably looked like this:

And I was singing and singing and then... WHAM out of the 4th dimension I fall asleep.

So I'm asleep at the tree, which is probably illegal. And then the rest of my life was ruined by a dream, but I'm not going tell you what it was. But I will draw a picture.

It was horrifying and I just kinda made the volcanoes up.

But I learned an important lesson that day. LIFE IS IMPORTANT because anyone could get attacked any second by anything. You should treat life like each day could be your last because something is hungry.
So I wrote more of my famous poetry about this:

     When doing nothing, nothing is done
    But somone or something else is doing something

   For you

 Because they are hungry.

Gettin it done, for your own life

Cause you can get ahead and SURVIVE



Tailored

Hallelujah! ! ! My clothes fit. Finally Tailored.
Yah, it's hard to find the right size of clothes when they don't sell your size in stores. I used to look like an idiot, blundering around in the wrong size of clothes.

But now I have nice clothes, that are actually special just for my body, and I look nice compared to before. (Although I still probably looked nice as an idiot.)
For once I'm not making fun of anything other than myself and the store brand jerks who believe in Monosiesm (one size fits all). Which is a really stupid religeon if you ask me.
But back to clothes: My new fittings do not matter.
I bet now that I have them, I'm going to grow a couple inches in 4 directions and my tailored clothes are going to end up on my little brother. And then he'll spill mustard on them.